Hey! It’s been over a week since I’ve gotten the opportunity to sit down and write, and I am excited to bring this post to you today. I apologize for missing last Monday and Thursday. I was not intentional enough about working ahead, and when the craziness of life hit last week, I came up short. Lesson learned. Plan ahead. Write in “batches.” I’ll keep working on it. All that being said, I can’t wait for you to read this post. It’s something that ALL LEADERS should work towards… BEING MORE TRANSFORMATIONAL.

In February, I wrote a blog that started discussing the topic of “Transformational” coaches vs. “Transactional” ones. If you are unfamiliar with the two terms, you can check out that post by clicking here.

This topic most often comes up in reference to “coaching,” but it is definitely something that applies to all leaders. We all have the power to transform lives and empower our people, whether that’s a coach>athlete relationship or a manager>employee relationship. We all make a difference and have an impact. It’s really just a matter of deciding on and being intentional about the kind of impact that we want to make.

You give your players memories, for better or for worse, that will stay with them until the day they die.” – Joe Ehrman

If you are not a coach, substitute the word “leader” (or the term that describes your situation) each time you see the word “coach,” and substitute “people” (or your equivalent) each time you see the word “players.” This is important stuff, and we all need to be able to relate it to our individual situation.

How Do We Become More Transformational?

In Joe Ehrmann’s book, InsideOut Coaching, he identifies 4 questions that we all must answer in order for us to be the most effective and the most transformational that we can be. Let’s look at those 4 questions here.

1. Why Do I Coach (Lead)?

We’ve talked about “why” before. Having a powerful “why” is the key to success. If you do not have a strong “why,” it is so much easier to give up when adversity strikes. I talked about that idea in this blog post. However, outside of the self-serving, sustaining power of having a strong “why,” there exists an equally important use. Identifying our “why” allows us to identify if we are in our role for ourselves or if we are in it for the people that we lead. If the answer to this first question is centered around yourself, you’re missing a great opportunity to be transformational. At that point, we need to re-evaluate and come up with a better “why.” If your “why” is centered around others, you are well on your way to being transformational and having a long-lasting, positive impact.

2. Why Do I Coach (Lead) The Way I Coach (Lead)?

Often times, the methods we use are things that we learned from those who coached/lead us. We don’t even think about “how.” We just go out and do it. The challenge in this question is to be intentional about everything we say and do. When we are being intentional about the way we coach/lead others, we will realize that not every person/situation calls for the same leadership style, and that is when we begin to maximize our impact. I am coaching Billy this way, in this moment, because that is what he needs to be successful right now. That’s a simple, but powerful concept.

3. What Does It Feel Like To Be Coached (Lead) By Me?

This might be the most powerful, yet overlooked question in Ehrmann’s list. It certainly provided me with a swift kick in the pants the first time I read it. At that point in my career, I had honestly never even thought about what it felt like to be coached by me. It didn’t matter to me then. I was coaching it, and they had better take that coaching whether they liked it or not. I would bet that, if we’re all being honest here, most of the people reading this would say they have felt the same way at some point in time.

This question is what gives us empathy. It is what truly allows us to be transformational. If we are concerned about the impact (positive/negative) that we are making, it will change the way we coach. I’m not talking about a kumbaya, sit around the campfire, hand-holding type of leadership. I think this is where a lot of people get turned off because they misunderstand this. I’m talking about the kind of leadership that builds people up and holds them accountable. I’m talking about the type of leadership that pushes people to become the best version of themselves. I’m talking about the type of leadership that has built enough trust with their people that they can be firm and demanding without losing the relationship. You want to see a real life version of what this looks like? Take a look at Gregg Popovich.

Pop has been the coach of the San Antonio Spurs since 1996. He is notorious for his rants/screaming/etc… on the sidelines. However, his players LOVE him. He earns their trust. He puts in the time and effort off of the court to be able to coach them HARD on the court. They might not always like him in the moment, but they never doubt their love for him or his love for them. That’s the kind of leader I want to be. I have a long way to go.

Have you earned the trust of your people? Can you coach them hard and feel confident that they will walk away knowing that you have their very best interests at heart?

I could spend all day on this question, but I think I need to move on.

4. How Do You Define Success?

Start with the end in mind. If success is based on “wins,” it’ll be a bumpy ride, and you’ll lead in a way that misses the mark. It’s sometimes said by coaches that they won’t know if they’ve been successful until about 30 years down the road when they get to see what kind of husbands/wives/parents/citizens their kids become. It’s a little cliche, but there’s a lot of truth and wisdom in it as well. If success is about helping others reach their personal goals and getting the very best out of people, then you will coach one way. If it’s about wins, you’ll coach another way.

“Outside of parenting there might not be a better platform than coaching to transform boys and girls into healthy and thriving men and women.” – Joe Ehrmann

Next Steps

Obviously, there’s a lot more to becoming a “transformational” coach/leader than just answering these 4 questions. However, I don’t think any of us can get very far on our journey toward becoming transformational if we do not start here. Start by doing an honest self-evaluation and answering these 4 questions. If your answers do not align with who you really want to be as a coach/leader, it’s time to make some changes. After you answer those questions, figure out how strategies that will allow you to put your answers into ACTION.

“Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the mouth.” – Mike Tyson

Having a plan or putting words on paper isn’t good enough. We have got to be coaches and leaders that take action. We have to be intentional about how we spend our time, the words we use, and the way we make our people feel. We don’t do this because it’s what is best for us or because it makes us feel good. We do it because They Deserve It.

I’m sure there will be most posts to come on this topic of transformational leadership. It’s just too important not to spend time on it. Thank you for taking the time to read this. Please share it with anyone who might find it useful.  We’ll see you next time!